My mentor at Mastercraft Industries always said, “Never, ever assume.” Unfortunately, the accuracy of that statement never entered my mind when we were signing the plethora of documents required to close on the sale of our house.
“Do you want us to issue you a certified check from the proceeds?” the realtor asked.
“No, just put it in my US Bank account, and when we get to Sedona, I will get a certified check to take to the closing for the house we purchased. I already checked, and they have three US Banks in Sedona.”
Our possessions were on the way to Sedona and we spent the weekend with our son and his family before heading to Sedona early Monday morning. Our old house closing was on Tuesday afternoon and the scheduled time for the new house closing was Wednesday at 1:00 PM.
We stayed in Moab, Utah the first night. The next day, as I drove to Sedona, my cell phone beckoned me. I gingerly pulled over to the side of the highway just in time for the caller to hang up. The voice mail from the Sedona title company said, “We have a problem with the closing. Please call back as soon as possible.”
“What seems to be the problem?” I asked calmly, never imagining the absurdity of the events to follow.
“The proceeds from the sale of your house haven’t arrived, and the girl I talked to was very snotty when she said, ‘The money is in the US Bank.’” Forgetting my instructions, I said, “I wonder why the title company didn’t just send the proceeds to you? No worries — when we get there I’ll just stop at the US Bank in Sedona and get a cashier’s check.”
“There isn’t a US Bank in Sedona.”
“Sure there is. I went online and there are three.”
“Uh no. I’m looking online right now and the only banks I see are Chase, Wells Fargo, and Bank of America.”
“That can’t be. Would you please look again?”
“Okay, I looked again and there is not one US Bank in Sedona.”
“Well I Googled US Banks in Sedona, and it said there were three.”
“There are United States of America banks, but not one US Bank.”
I almost wet my pants in panic, and then I laughed so hard, tears were streaming down my face.
“Uh, okay. I get it. I will call my bank in Denver and see where the nearest US Bank is and get back to you.”
After several more cell phone calls, stops on the highway, and stress accumulation, I concluded that the closest US Bank to Sedona was in Prescott, Arizona. By this time, I figured that even if I drove 15-20 miles an hour over the speed limit, I wouldn’t get to the Prescott US Bank before it closed. Oh, my goodness … I had to come up with a plan. And this plan had to work perfectly.
I set the alarm in the hotel for 6:30 AM. I left Sedona at around 7:00 AM so that I could arrive at the bank when it opened (9:00 AM). Fortunately, I allowed extra time, because I got lost. As I recall, I put the address in my GPS as South instead of North. A very kind red-haired woman gave me directions on how to backtrack through the many construction cone zones, and I arrived at the bank about two minutes before it opened. Whew! I got the check and hurried back to Sedona, made the closing right on time, went back to the hotel, and collapsed.
Nevertheless, our furniture had not arrived, so we had the keys to an empty house. Boo-hiss. UGH. Another night in the hotel with our furry, traumatized, longhair Dachshund, Jethro.
“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (Matthew 6:34)